One of the more practical Christian parenting tips I can give you is to help your children learn the best ways to make decisions in life.
Foundationally, we all need to help our children understand that in making major decisions, it is always wise to seek guidance from the Word of God.
Biblical Basis: “Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path” (Psalm 119:105).
Susan Yates, who often writes on child-related issues, suggests showing kids how to use a “filter” in making decisions. She says that the filter on her coffee pot strains out the grounds and leaves a pure, delicious cup of coffee. Kids need a filter to help them sort through their thoughts while making decisions.
The most important filter your child can have in any decision-making process is the Word of God. God speaks directly to certain issues — and makes it clear that such things as lying and having sex outside of marriage are wrong. Teach your children to refer to the Bible when faced with decision-making by setting the example of doing the same when you deal with other people in your church, neighborhood, or workplace.[1]
~ Shortcut to Understanding ~
Free free to share this story with your child:
Back in biblical times, they didn’t have street lamps like we have today. They didn’t have electricity or light bulbs. So do you know what they did?
They made little clay pots specially designed to sit on top of a person’s foot. The pots were filled with a little oil, and a wick was put in and it was lit just like a candle. It was just like having a lamp on a foot. This way, when it was night, people who were walking outside could see where they were going. It’s kind of like having a night light, isn’t it?
The Bible is like that little lamp. Psalm 119:105 says, “Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path.” God’s Word — the Bible — helps us to see where we should go in life.[2]
Of course, our kids will inevitably confront certain issues that do not have black and white answers from the Bible. Teach them that when they confront such issues, they can still draw principles from Scripture that will help them. For example, the two greatest commandments — “love God” and “love your neighbor” — can often help us in making such decisions.
Here’s another consideration. The more we understand God’s Word, the better our minds will be trained to recognized counterfeit belief systems that can lead us to make wrong decisions. It’s much like bankers who are trained to recognize counterfeit dollar bills. They spend a lot of time with real dollar bills, examining every quality of real dollar bills (like the coloring of dollar bills, and how they feel), so that when a counterfeit dollar bill shows up, they’ll recognize it instantly.
Scripture says that “solid food [God’s Word] is for the mature, who by constant use have trained themselves to distinguish good from evil” (Hebrews 5:14). As our minds are trained by Scripture, we are better equipped to recognize error and evil. It is therefore wise to start our children in early childhood in feeding upon God’s Word for wisdom.
Seeking Godly Counsel
A Principle to Remember: Before making big decisions, it is wise to seek advice from other people that you trust.
Biblical Basis: “Many advisers make victory sure” (Proverbs 11:14).
One of the things we learn in the Book of Proverbs is that it is wise to seek godly counsel before making major decisions. When we are unsure about a course of action, seeking advice from others can “make victory sure.” A wise man seeks the wisdom of others.
~ Shortcut to Understanding ~
Free free to share this story with your child:
Once upon a time there was a man named Joe who decided to build a log cabin on a small mountain. He did the best he could — but everything went wrong. He built the windows crooked. The doors wouldn’t stay shut. The roof wouldn’t keep the rain out. It was terrible.
Joe decided to tear the cabin down and start all over. This time, though, he decided to get some advice. He asked a neighbor with a nice cabin how to build a good cabin. And the man in the cabin gave him lots of good advice on all the things to do to build a good cabin.
So Joe made another cabin — and this one turned out great!
Like the Bible says, there is great wisdom is seeking advice from others.
[1] Susan Yates, “Helping Your Child Make Choices,” Today’s Christian Woman, 1994; downloaded from “Christianity Today” site on America Online.
[2] Adapted from Louise Kohr, In-the-Bag Stories: Object Talks for Children (Cincinnati, OH: Standard Publishing, 1990), p. 35.
— Dr. Ron Rhodes
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